fredag, april 11, 2008
onsdag, april 09, 2008
Bakken - nu endeligt på EB
Ja sgu - we made it!
Bears håner modstanderne
Bakken Bears agter at køre Svendborg Rabbits over i DM-finalerne. De gør det allerede på internettet. Se videoen her
Kaninerne fra Svendborg bliver kørt over i DM-finalen, lyder budskabet fra Bakken Bears.
Bjørnene fra Århus har væsset kløerne frem mod torsdagens første DM-finale i basket. Bakken Bears møder Svendborg Rabbits og der venter de fynske kaniner en svær opgave.
Faktisk bliver de kørt over, hvis det står til Bakken Bears.
Den århusianske topklub, der er forsvarende danske mestre, varmer allerede nu op til guldkampen med en markant video, der klart signalerer indikationerne.
Øvrige Eb-Nyheder
13:05 · Mick Øgendahl får tæsk af rocker - (var ikke bare Paul på Skanderborg?)
13:04 · Venus trækker stikket ud
13:00 · Kommentar: Kong Todd af Herning
12:34 · Bears håner modstanderne
12:31 · Lav din personlige radiostation
12:58 · Indisk pige med to ansigter
10:58 · Musikvideo: The Floor Is Made Of Lava - 'Happy Monday'
10:27 · Konfrontation: Reklame-oprøret
07:47 · Teenagere filmer voldsorgie
07:00 · Se Ekstra Bladets nye reklame spot
14:01 · Justin flår tøjet af Madonna i ny video
11:23 · Ekstrababen Mona tæmmer slangen
10:03 · Smid reklamerne i postkassen - så kan de lære det!
07:08 · Mand indebrændt for øjnene af brødre
17:27 · Musikvideo: The Alpine - 'Youniverse'
13:05 · Musikvideo: Figurines - 'Childhood Verse'
1.Her er de hemmelige lystzoner
2.Billigste teleselskaber bedst
3.Analsex sundt for mænd
4.BH giver hængebryster
5.Unges druk skader hjernen
6.16-årig dreng dræbt af haj
1.Paradise-Susan havde sex med P. Diddy
2.Quiz-deltager tog tv-vært på brysterne
3.Romantik på Centre Court
4.16-årig dreng dræbt af haj
5.Yngre mand dræbt af lastbil
6.Var det snyd at Martin vandt?
Bears håner modstanderne
Bakken Bears agter at køre Svendborg Rabbits over i DM-finalerne. De gør det allerede på internettet. Se videoen her
Kaninerne fra Svendborg bliver kørt over i DM-finalen, lyder budskabet fra Bakken Bears.
Bjørnene fra Århus har væsset kløerne frem mod torsdagens første DM-finale i basket. Bakken Bears møder Svendborg Rabbits og der venter de fynske kaniner en svær opgave.
Faktisk bliver de kørt over, hvis det står til Bakken Bears.
Den århusianske topklub, der er forsvarende danske mestre, varmer allerede nu op til guldkampen med en markant video, der klart signalerer indikationerne.
Øvrige Eb-Nyheder
13:05 · Mick Øgendahl får tæsk af rocker - (var ikke bare Paul på Skanderborg?)
13:04 · Venus trækker stikket ud
13:00 · Kommentar: Kong Todd af Herning
12:34 · Bears håner modstanderne
12:31 · Lav din personlige radiostation
12:58 · Indisk pige med to ansigter
10:58 · Musikvideo: The Floor Is Made Of Lava - 'Happy Monday'
10:27 · Konfrontation: Reklame-oprøret
07:47 · Teenagere filmer voldsorgie
07:00 · Se Ekstra Bladets nye reklame spot
14:01 · Justin flår tøjet af Madonna i ny video
11:23 · Ekstrababen Mona tæmmer slangen
10:03 · Smid reklamerne i postkassen - så kan de lære det!
07:08 · Mand indebrændt for øjnene af brødre
17:27 · Musikvideo: The Alpine - 'Youniverse'
13:05 · Musikvideo: Figurines - 'Childhood Verse'
1.Her er de hemmelige lystzoner
2.Billigste teleselskaber bedst
3.Analsex sundt for mænd
4.BH giver hængebryster
5.Unges druk skader hjernen
6.16-årig dreng dræbt af haj
1.Paradise-Susan havde sex med P. Diddy
2.Quiz-deltager tog tv-vært på brysterne
3.Romantik på Centre Court
4.16-årig dreng dræbt af haj
5.Yngre mand dræbt af lastbil
6.Var det snyd at Martin vandt?
Totalforbud NU! Straks! Omgående!
Hvis det passer, at "BHer hæmmer bryststørrelsen", så kan det absolut kun gå for langsomt med et helt og aldeles totalt forbud.
OleF; er du ikke mand for en underskriftsindsamling, så vi kan gå til højeste instans?
tirsdag, april 01, 2008
I take it back ...
... Bare glem hvad jeg skrev om dårlige april-jokes - den her er tæt på at være genial: http://www.google.com.au/intl/en/gday/index.html
Dagen i dag
Lad os nu bare få det overstået, så vi kan komme videre i livet ...
Kære nyhedsmedie-snuder - Vi har luret jer:
Kære nyhedsmedie-snuder - Vi har luret jer:
- Morten Olsen stopper som landstræner: http://avisen.dk/henrik-store-larsen-overtager-landsholdet-310308.aspx
- FCK har fået ny spiller: http://www.fck.dk/index.php?pageid=754&newsid=7815
- 1. maj og grundlovsdag bliver slået sammen: http://www.24timer.dk/24t/forums/show/404.page
- Avis indfører trykfølsom skærm - bare smid musen væk: http://www.jv.dk/artikel/373886
- Thomas Blachman skal hjælpe Ny Alliance: http://www.bt.dk/article/20080401/politik/80401004/
- Heidi røg ud af X-factor ved en fejl: http://politiken.dk/kultur/article489274.ece
Og selvom vi gerne ville tro på den første, så gør vi det alligevel ikke, for vi er klogere end jer alle!
mandag, marts 31, 2008
torsdag, marts 27, 2008
Olsen Raus
An ever ongoing blog... Olsen skal ud...
Læst på Stiftens blog:
"Kommentar af Tore Mott Laursen skrevet torsdag d. 27. marts kl. 13:59
Problemet med Morten Olsen er, at når han siger, at han ser alle sas-liga kampene i fjernsynet, mener han i virkeligheden at han spiller Championship Manager. Men fordi hans computer er ligeså gammel som han selv er, så kan han alene spille med en lille bitte database med klubber fra Københavns området."
Hahaha det er da humor!
Læst på Stiftens blog:
"Kommentar af Tore Mott Laursen skrevet torsdag d. 27. marts kl. 13:59
Problemet med Morten Olsen er, at når han siger, at han ser alle sas-liga kampene i fjernsynet, mener han i virkeligheden at han spiller Championship Manager. Men fordi hans computer er ligeså gammel som han selv er, så kan han alene spille med en lille bitte database med klubber fra Københavns området."
Hahaha det er da humor!
onsdag, marts 26, 2008
Sproglige perler på en snor
OK indrømmet; Jeg har det dybt ambivalent med Steffen Jungersen. På sine gode dage kan manden få mig til at smile fra øre til øre, mens han på sine sløje dage får mig til at gribe efter det nærmeste, der kan fungere som slagvåben.
I denne omtale af en ny plade fra et par af Sepulturas gamle frontmænd må jeg absolut bøje mig i støvet for Steff, der byder på en sand perlerække af sproglige billeder og ordlige finurligheder.
Her er det absolutte top-eksempel for de dovne:
"Vi taler med andre ord om den musikalske pendant til at få skrællet huden af de ædlere dele med en rusten ostehøvl – om end det retfærdigvis føles ulig mere behageligt."
Det er fa'mer sjav!
I denne omtale af en ny plade fra et par af Sepulturas gamle frontmænd må jeg absolut bøje mig i støvet for Steff, der byder på en sand perlerække af sproglige billeder og ordlige finurligheder.
Her er det absolutte top-eksempel for de dovne:
"Vi taler med andre ord om den musikalske pendant til at få skrællet huden af de ædlere dele med en rusten ostehøvl – om end det retfærdigvis føles ulig mere behageligt."
Det er fa'mer sjav!
tirsdag, marts 25, 2008
Jeg er forundret ...
... over, at ingen af jer (ingen nævnt, ingen glemt, men I ved nok hvem, jeg tænker på ...) har fundet lejlighed til at fremhæve denne udgydelse fra Ekstra Sprøjten: http://ekstrabladet.dk/sport/dansk_fodbold/article984855.ece
Tillad mig at bemærke det totalt tåbelige i at bryste sig (sorry) af en 22 år gammel triumf, når dagens hold spiller som lort!
Og som en ekstra service er her for nemheds skyld den smukkeste trøje - nåja tabellen taler jo også for sig selv ;-)
Tillad mig at bemærke det totalt tåbelige i at bryste sig (sorry) af en 22 år gammel triumf, når dagens hold spiller som lort!
Og som en ekstra service er her for nemheds skyld den smukkeste trøje - nåja tabellen taler jo også for sig selv ;-)
lørdag, marts 15, 2008
fredag, marts 14, 2008
torsdag, marts 13, 2008
Ugens overskrifter på EkstraHadet
Hvor får de det dog fra???
Danmark fristed for elskere af dyresex
Bøsser drak Jokke fuld
Udrykning til bagsædesex
Sær gnom skræmmer sydamerikanere
Skuespiller vred over lille pik
fredag, marts 07, 2008
Når ord er overflødige II
Og ja, jeg må godt poste den slags i disse Muhammed-tider, for min Far er præst ...
torsdag, marts 06, 2008
Endnu et svar fra Niskes fætter
Niske og Marie - Fun loving animals sender ofte lange beskrivende mails om deres oplevelser - og da de skrev lidt for USA-kritisk om mødet med Miami, meldte en af de mange indavlede fætre fra USA sig ind i koret og sendte os en længere svada om Bush-Amerikas herligheder. Indlægget er desværre slettet fra min indbox (Måske kan Stigsen hjælpe med at finde det)
Men her er et dugfrisk brev fra Niskes fætre: Cledus Nietzsche & Red. N.Ecki fra Arizona:
Damn hippies!!!
Here is my take on your socalled leftwing road nature-trip:
Get a haircut, buy a Chevrolet and a proper gun! Global warning is amyth - say it! If you don't love it - leave it.Well, knock me down and steal muh teeth! Butter my butt and call me abiscuit. I'll slap you so hard, your clothes will be outta style. Ithink Amerika is cute as a sack full of puppies, and if things get anybetter, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it. Miami and itscarpark is gooder than grits. The place is so dry, the trees arebribing the dogs, and it's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepperpatch.
Reading your mail is so hard to do, that it's like trying to herdcats. And your momma's so fat, when she got on the scales to beweighed, it said 'To be continued'.
And the communist guy from the Zoo fell out of the ugly tree and hitevery branch on the way down, and with him the wheels are stillturning, but the hamsters dead. My advice from my rocking chair is:"Can I eat it - can it eat me? - can I fuck it - Can it fuck me?" - so damn left wing Kyoto-loving seal huggers - get your asses home and geta real job - what about pumping some gaz or flop some cheeseburgersat the ol B-B-que-Grill at good ol' MacDonalds - You'd be loving it!
Best Regards from Michaels two cousins; Cledus Nietzsche and Red. N.Eck, Tuscon Arizona.
Here is my take on your socalled leftwing road nature-trip:
Get a haircut, buy a Chevrolet and a proper gun! Global warning is amyth - say it! If you don't love it - leave it.Well, knock me down and steal muh teeth! Butter my butt and call me abiscuit. I'll slap you so hard, your clothes will be outta style. Ithink Amerika is cute as a sack full of puppies, and if things get anybetter, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it. Miami and itscarpark is gooder than grits. The place is so dry, the trees arebribing the dogs, and it's been hotter'n a goat's butt in a pepperpatch.
Reading your mail is so hard to do, that it's like trying to herdcats. And your momma's so fat, when she got on the scales to beweighed, it said 'To be continued'.
And the communist guy from the Zoo fell out of the ugly tree and hitevery branch on the way down, and with him the wheels are stillturning, but the hamsters dead. My advice from my rocking chair is:"Can I eat it - can it eat me? - can I fuck it - Can it fuck me?" - so damn left wing Kyoto-loving seal huggers - get your asses home and geta real job - what about pumping some gaz or flop some cheeseburgersat the ol B-B-que-Grill at good ol' MacDonalds - You'd be loving it!
Best Regards from Michaels two cousins; Cledus Nietzsche and Red. N.Eck, Tuscon Arizona.
Nå ord er alt nok ...
Jeg fik lige denne fra en kollega. Og ja, den er lidt lang, men den er fa'mer sjav ...
*****
I have bought my share of t-shirts from T-Shirt Hell and thus read your tri-monthly newsletter. The most recent newsletter is unusually insightful and not the regular truck load of sarcastic comments wrapped in filth:
>>snip<<
Since the number of presidential candidates has been winnowed down to a mere handful over the past few weeks, I have been in desperate need of seeing a huge collection of douchebags in one place. So, I decided to watch the Academy Awards last week. There I was, watching the Oscars on my picture-in-picture screen. And as I watched these bloated egos and self-aggrandizing jerkoffs pat themselves on their collective back, I couldn't help but compare it to what I was viewing on my main screen:
hardcore pornography.
It was in that moment that I had the following realization: mainstream art is just porn for your emotions. When you think about it, lust is an emotion just like any other. The only difference is that instead of coming out in the form of laughter or tears, it comes out in the form of cloudy goo. And if you’re really lucky, it still comes out on or in the face of a loved one: so really, it’s virtually identical to the rest of them.
Art is just a way for us to feed whatever emotions we are feeling at the moment. When you're angry, you may listen to a metal album to get it out of your system. When you're sad, you'll check out a tearjerker to have a good cry. If you need a good laugh, you watch the Zapruder film. The same goes if you need a gaygood scare, a thrill, and so on. Art is just there to serve our emotional needs, and porn is no different.
In its own way, porn is the purest form of art. Largely because its merit isn't up for debate. Did you get your nut? "Yes." Well then the porn worked. Whereas when someone laughs at a lame sitcom or cries during an episode of Grey's Anatomy; we'll judge them and tell them they're wrong- however honest their reaction may have been. None of that with porn. If you came, it was a triumph. No thumbs up/thumbs down, no star grading system: just proof-positive that the work accomplished its goal… right there in that wad of tissues.
I don't want to seem like I'm giving porn too much undue praise here. At the end of the day, I know it's incredibly easy to produce; the people who produce it are attention-starved assholes; and ultimately, what they provide me with I can provide for myself if I really care to. But you know what? The same exact thing can be said of so called real "artists."
So, don't think of this as a tip of the hat to the porn industry. Think of this as my way of saying that creative types aren't all that important either. Ron Jeremy will never be held in the same regard as Marlon Brando, nor should he be. But you know who else shouldn't be held in the same regard as Marlon Brando? Marlon Brando. To anyone who has the ability to think and create for themselves (which is everyone, if they'd only take five seconds to realize it), porn stars and "legitimate" actors are equally useless.
Art - just like love and all other abstract concepts - is nice to have in your life, maybe even necessary. But when you get right down to it, it is cheap to come by and you can always get it from a different source.
So, to all the artists out there - be you musicians, film makers or anything else - get the fuck over yourselves. You're already obsolete; you just don't know it yet. Fortunately for you, not many other people do either. Until then...Hooray for (a world without) Hollywood.
Snipped from
http://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/newsletter/newsletter_030308.php
*****
I have bought my share of t-shirts from T-Shirt Hell and thus read your tri-monthly newsletter. The most recent newsletter is unusually insightful and not the regular truck load of sarcastic comments wrapped in filth:
>>snip<<
Since the number of presidential candidates has been winnowed down to a mere handful over the past few weeks, I have been in desperate need of seeing a huge collection of douchebags in one place. So, I decided to watch the Academy Awards last week. There I was, watching the Oscars on my picture-in-picture screen. And as I watched these bloated egos and self-aggrandizing jerkoffs pat themselves on their collective back, I couldn't help but compare it to what I was viewing on my main screen:
hardcore pornography.
It was in that moment that I had the following realization: mainstream art is just porn for your emotions. When you think about it, lust is an emotion just like any other. The only difference is that instead of coming out in the form of laughter or tears, it comes out in the form of cloudy goo. And if you’re really lucky, it still comes out on or in the face of a loved one: so really, it’s virtually identical to the rest of them.
Art is just a way for us to feed whatever emotions we are feeling at the moment. When you're angry, you may listen to a metal album to get it out of your system. When you're sad, you'll check out a tearjerker to have a good cry. If you need a good laugh, you watch the Zapruder film. The same goes if you need a gaygood scare, a thrill, and so on. Art is just there to serve our emotional needs, and porn is no different.
In its own way, porn is the purest form of art. Largely because its merit isn't up for debate. Did you get your nut? "Yes." Well then the porn worked. Whereas when someone laughs at a lame sitcom or cries during an episode of Grey's Anatomy; we'll judge them and tell them they're wrong- however honest their reaction may have been. None of that with porn. If you came, it was a triumph. No thumbs up/thumbs down, no star grading system: just proof-positive that the work accomplished its goal… right there in that wad of tissues.
I don't want to seem like I'm giving porn too much undue praise here. At the end of the day, I know it's incredibly easy to produce; the people who produce it are attention-starved assholes; and ultimately, what they provide me with I can provide for myself if I really care to. But you know what? The same exact thing can be said of so called real "artists."
So, don't think of this as a tip of the hat to the porn industry. Think of this as my way of saying that creative types aren't all that important either. Ron Jeremy will never be held in the same regard as Marlon Brando, nor should he be. But you know who else shouldn't be held in the same regard as Marlon Brando? Marlon Brando. To anyone who has the ability to think and create for themselves (which is everyone, if they'd only take five seconds to realize it), porn stars and "legitimate" actors are equally useless.
Art - just like love and all other abstract concepts - is nice to have in your life, maybe even necessary. But when you get right down to it, it is cheap to come by and you can always get it from a different source.
So, to all the artists out there - be you musicians, film makers or anything else - get the fuck over yourselves. You're already obsolete; you just don't know it yet. Fortunately for you, not many other people do either. Until then...Hooray for (a world without) Hollywood.
Snipped from
http://www.tshirthell.com/miscpages/newsletter/newsletter_030308.php
fredag, februar 29, 2008
Tilbage i skoen
"Her, på Ørting-Falling gamle skole, fangede jeg i slutningen af 18hundredetallet en løbsk gnu, som efter at have omløbet degnens niece tog til at bisse - ganske vist i ensomhed, men alligevel. Gnuen er netop løbet østen ind i kirkefløjen, hvorfor den ikke er på billedet. Det er mig i de grønne sokker helt bagerst på billedet."
Patter, balleklask, snurrende fjernsyn og indkøbsvogne.... Jo, standarden er steget siden sidste sæson. Det eneste der måske mangler ville være en mindre feature med centrifugerende pelsdyr... skal se om jeg kan finde videoen et sted - jeg burde have den. I midlertid må i nøjes med en historie, som jeg fik genopfrisket, da jeg i egen høje person sørgede for at Odder-borgerne fik deres daglige nyhedsfix...
Med hjertevarme og lune trøfler
åge hin tracthor aka den sure redaktuer
torsdag, februar 28, 2008
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